Home
kallanda_lee [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
kallanda_lee

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

Comfort & Monsters, Chapter 2 [May. 4th, 2007|03:05 am]
[Tags|, , , , , , , , , ]
[mood | content]

Chapter 2

The one-armed man was sitting at the bar of the Amity Harbor Restaurant almost motionlessly, moving only when he brought his glass of whiskey to his lips. The place was nearly empty and he was the only one at the bar. His hat was still on and the collar of his coat was pulled up as if to protect him from the harsh weather, even though the restaurant’s interior left the winter cold safely outside.

Captain Jack Harkness was sitting at a nearby table, enjoying the island’s specialty food – fish. Unsurprising, as a considerable portion of the population were actually fishermen.

Jack had read up on Ishmael Chambers – for that was the other man’s full name. He had spent the better half of the day in the library, going through old records. Chambers was indeed a war veteran, and now a newspaper man, as his father was before him. Less than 2 years ago, Ishmael had found important information in a murder case. The info had proven to be invaluable and had resulted in the release of the accused, a Japanese man. Jack found that quite admirable, in a time where racial tensions were still bound to be…well, tense.

The other man he had seen last night was Art Moran, the local sheriff. San Piedro Island was not exactly populated by law enforcement; Jack should expect no trouble from that side. The place only had a population of about five thousand. It was a quiet community, with low crime figures. In general, life must have been uneventful here, although Jack feared that might change now they had unwanted visitors.

Jack still hadn’t pinpointed who or what exactly they were. He was unfamiliar with the creatures he had seen last night. They were most likely from some aquatic planet, but that still left him with hundreds of worlds to choose from. The sample he had taken was sulfuric, but it did not really help him in his search either. Considering the time period he was in, he was probably going to have to do this the old-fashioned way. And that probably meant getting his hands dirty. Maybe he could try reasoning with them. He smirked. That’s how the Doctor would do it.

Taking his mind off the creatures and his favourite Doctor, Jack’s attention drifted back to Ishmael Chambers. He found the man quite fascinating. Growing up many centuries from now, the Great Wars of old were nothing but stories he read in history books. The veterans were strangers appearing on badly preserved black-and-white pictures. He did not really think of them as being flesh and blood until he first ended up in this time, when he first adopted the name of Jack Harkness. Suddenly World War II had become personal.

Some things never change, he thought, it’s always the young men who are cannon fodder. The men who actually declare wars remain safe, while boys barely out of their teens risk life and limb for a cause that’s not even theirs.

Long ago – or a long time from now, depending on perspective - he had been a soldier too. Not because of ideology, but because the enemy had been so terrible there would have been nothing left if no one was willing to risk fighting them. He had seen things – horrible thing – things no-one should ever see. While medicine in his time was more advanced, no one really found a cure for the psychological trauma of it all. With time, weapons too grew more deadly and destructive. There were monstrous ways to torture. Man created weapons that mutilated in ways that would make even a seasoned soldier cringe. He’d seen a boy once who had such large holes in his body; you could actually see the bed under him through the wounds. Worst part of it, the boy actually lived.

Jack Harkness pondered on the fate of Ishmael Chambers. He thought of the fates of so many men in this century, which had gone to war and returned with their bodies and minds broken. They were pictures in a book no more. They were real, beautiful men – like the one who was sitting at the bar.

In his time, Jack would simply walk up to him and invite him to his bedroom. Worst case scenario, he’d get a “no”. In this time, more caution was advised. Jack wouldn’t give up without a fight though.

After finishing his dinner, Jack sat down next to Ishmael. He ordered a drink for himself. Alcohol had already taken its toll on Ishmael, and it didn’t look like he’d be a pleasant drunk.

The journalist gave him a nod out of mandatory politeness.

Jack signaled the bartender and ordered a beer. Not that beer was his favourite poison, but his drink of choice simply wasn’t served in this century.

Ishmael was quietly eying him with the inquisitive look of a news reporter, despite the considerable volume of alcohol that was now mixed in with his blood.

“You a soldier?” Ishmael finally asked.

“Used to be,” Jack replied. “Captain Jack Harkness”, he introduced himself, while extending his hand

Ishmael’s fingers unwrapped from around the glass before him and firmly shook his hand. “Ishmael Chambers”, he said, oblivious to the fact that Jack already knew who he was. “Captain, eh? Lucky bastard. I was just a foot soldier.”

“That how you lost your arm?” Jack asked, before he could consider the tactlessness of his question.

Ishmael smirked and took another sip of his poison. “You know what? I think I like you, Jack Harkness. You’re a no-bullshit type of guy. Most folk here are scared shitless to ask about it. Even after all these years. Figure they’re scared I’d bore ‘em with the sad story of my life.” He smirked again. “I lost it at Tarawa. Considering how many men died there, I got off lucky.”

Ishmael downed his drink with such speed, that Jack noted that lucky was not the adjective he’d use to describe him.

For a moment Jack thought he’d order another glass of whiskey. For a moment, Ishmael actually considered it. Instead the journalist turned his attention to Jack.

“So tell me Captain Harkness, what brings a man like you to a place like this?”

“Research”, Jack replied.

“Scientist?”

“Not quite.”

Ishmael looked at Jack for few more seconds before he realised that was all the answer he’d get.

“Quiet type, huh?”

“It’s about the fish,” Jack finally said.

A sound escaped Ishmael Chambers lips and it took Jack a second to recognize it was laughter. It was so unexpected from this man, who carried his sadness with dignified silence. It was beautiful though, and more beautiful so because it was genuine.

“Wait, wait, you’re saying you came up to San Piedro from lord-knows-where to do research on dead fish?” He was trying to suppress more laughter. “Whatever you do, it must be one hell of a job.”

Jack flashed him a smile. He was glad the conversation had lightened up a bit at least.

“You have no idea.”, Jack said grinningly.

The smile still lingered around Ishmael Chambers’ lips and it was a joy to see.

“How did you even know about that? I haven’t even decided if I’ll put it in my paper.”

“I work for a secret organization that’s very interested in dead fish,” Jack semi-joked.

Ishmael jumped to his feet faster than Jack would expect from an inebriated man.

“Let’s go see fish then.”

A few minutes later, the two men were standing outside in the Marina. This day was even colder than the day before. It was snowing mildly. The little flakes melted on impact with anything in their way. This resulted in a certain cold dampness that got everywhere and made both of them been chilled to the bone. As if nature wasn’t tormenting them enough already, there was a sideways wind that made the snowflakes smash against their faces, eventually giving them a feeling of pins-and-needles.

Jack crouched down near the water, observing the quiet waters in daylight. The view in front of his eyes radiated a desolate beauty. The masts of the moored fishing boats protruded from the mist, waiting diligently until their owners would come for them. The mist itself was uneven, hanging over the water gracefully. Patches of deep green seawater could be seen now and then, and looked as if they had been colour-coordinated with the landscape on the other side of the bay.

What seemed to be lacking though, were dead fish. There were a few still left, yes. But only a fraction of what Jack had witnessed.

“There were more of them yesterday,” Ishmael said

Jack nodded. His hypothesis was that they ended up as dinner.

“Fishermen had a poor catch too, Jack, not just today but for three days consecutively.”

“And before that?” Jack asked. “Notice anything odd?”

“Not me. But some people saw lights. Have been seeing them even since. It’s making the islanders nervous. Suppose they’re prone to ghost stories.”

“Sounds like you don’t like ‘em.”

“Nah, they’re good folk. Life’s just different here, that’s all. Used to live in Seattle. Mentality’s, well…here it’s like if time stands still. Part of the charm, I guess.

Jack dipped his fingers into the green water. He paused. This wasn’t right.

“What’s wrong?” Ishmael asked behind him.

“It’s January,” Jack said. “The water should be colder.”

Ishmael kneeled down next to Jack. He too dipped his hand in the water.

“You’re right,” he said. “You could swim in this.”

In the distance a cluster of bubbles reached the surface. A light glow once again emanated from the depths.

“Christ. I guess they weren’t kidding.” Ishmael said.

Jack’s attention was drawn elsewhere though. There was a mild hum. It wasn’t coming from the water; the sound was located above their heads. A line formed on the sky, much like the trail of a jet plane, only the trail seemed on fire. Whatever it was, it was going at a much greater speed still. Its trajectory changed and the object deviated to the right. It got closer and now looked like a silver comet with a fiery tail.

The hum got louder and the sound soon resembled that of a landing plane. Only it was going too fast to land. It crashed a few miles further, tearing down a few cedar trees on impact. Black smoke rose up from behind the green curtain, only to spontaneously stop a few seconds later. The whole event was over as suddenly as it had started and anyone arriving to look just now would never believe what had just come to pass.

Behind Jack, Ishmael could barely believe his eyes. Jack jumped up, turning to face Ishmael.

I’m sorry, I must go.” He said apologetically.

When Jack started running towards the crash site, he honestly regretted having to leave Ishmael. Pleasantries would have to wait, though. Right now, he had an alien to catch.


link1 comment post comment

Comfort & Monsters, Chapter 1 [May. 4th, 2007|03:00 am]
[Tags|, , , , , , , , , ]
[mood | content]

Attention: This story contains SLASH, aka a m/m relationship. Don’t like it? Don’t read it! Don’t come whining later on.

Notes: This is one of my rather weird crossovers, namely Doctor Who/Torchwood/Snow Falling on Cedars. I first got the idea when I saw a “Captain Jack does everyone in every universe challenge” somewhere, but every time I try to write smut I end up with a plot.

I’m not even going to start thinking about which timeline it is in exactly, that would just hurt everyone’s brain. The story is written in such a way that you do not need to know the events of Snow Falling on Cedars, however the story contains spoilers for all fandoms. If it helps for the metal image : Ishmael was played by Ethan Hawke

Disclaimer: I don’t own Jack Harkness and Ishmael Chambers, I merely drool over them. Any other characters you recognise – nope, not mine either

Comfort & Monsters

Chapter 1

San Piedro Island, USA, January 1956

Jack Harkness looked out over the surface of the mist-clad water. All seemed calm and peaceful. Over the years one learns not to trust appearances, though. Something was lurking beneath. Something not from this Earth – and it had brought Jack to this place. He had not come by spacecraft or timeship. His journey was made on a good old-fashioned aero plane. He was still jetlagged from his trip from the UK, but resting was a luxury he could not afford right now – not before he had assessed the threat this creature posed.

He knelt down and dipped the small test tube into the dark water. Jack breathed in, the cold night air filling his lungs. Even the air bore something it should not. Jack picked up on a faint scent that drew his attention. It was a bit like sulfur, but not quite.

It was then that the water lit up. A fluorescent glow made its way up from the depths below, giving the water a yellow-green shine. The spectacle itself was quite beautiful and Jack could not help but admire it. Seconds later the light was gone – but something else had already started to float to the surface. Dozens – no hundreds of dead fish broke through the water, their lifeless bodies floating motionlessly on their sides, decorating the empty spaces between fishing boats.

Behind Jack something moved. He flung around with almost superhuman speed, hiding behind one of the barrels on the shore. Quiet footsteps made their way to the waterfront. A figure came to a standstill only a few feet away from him. The stranger wore a hat and a long coat. His breath made little puffy clouds every time it touched the air. More footsteps followed. The second figure was older and more heavy-set and was wearing some sort of uniform. He came to a stand next to the younger man.

“I swear, Ishmael, there were lights here before. I’m not going mad. It’s not the first time I’ve seen them, either.”

“I believe you.”

“Look, I don’t know how to tell this to people. I mean, lights and dead fish? I don’t know what they’d think…” the uniformed man said. “Maybe your paper could run a story…”

“So they think the journalist is mad, not the sheriff?” “Ishmael asked, some bitterness resounding in his voice.

The sheriff was already starting to apologise, but Ishmael cut him off.

“It’s all right, Art, I know you didn’t mean anything bad. Sure is strange, though. I’ll see what I can make of it.”

Ishmael pulled something out of his pocket. Jack could make out it was a notebook. There was something awkward about his movements though. He used the same hand to take out a pencil, and put the notebook on a barrel to write. Jack observed this strange ritual with interest.

“Got a flashlight?” Ishmael asked to Art.

The sheriff nodded and soon a light illuminated the shore, allowing Ishmael to see what he was writing. It also allowed Jack to see the reason for Ishmael’s strange behaviour. The journalist was missing his left arm.

Probably a veteran, Jack thought. The time was certainly right for it. And it was not just that either – Jack could make out weariness in the man; along with an unspoken deep-seeded hurt. Something had broken Ishmael and he was trying to pick up the pieces.

A journalist could be an ally or an enemy. Jack was rather hoping it would be the former, though. Not only could he use a man in search of the truth, but Jack had to admit he found Ishmael to be quite attractive. And they might have a thing or two in common.

Art turned the flashlight off again and Ishmael returned the little notebook to his pocket. The two figures disappeared into the night.

Jack waited until the footsteps died out completely. He still had some things to do. All seemed quiet again now, but Jack didn’t trust it for one single bit. He immersed a little vial into the water, filling it. Hopefully an analysis would give him more answers.

In the distance, a splash could be heard. Jack looked up in time to see the ripples, but whatever caused them had disappeared again.

Then another splash, on the right, but again the perpetrator was gone before Jack’s eyes turned to look at the spot.

Silence again.

Then something broke through the surface right in front of him. It was nothing more than black shadow, a small part of what must have been a larger creature. It was gone in less than two seconds, coming up only to grab one of the dead fish, dragging it back to the depths.

Part of Jack wanted to jump right in. He wanted to feel the adrenalin again. Instead, he controlled his urges. After all, he couldn’t do much good if he got eaten before he even started.

This time he’d be reasonable. He closed the vial, tucking it safely into his coat. He’d just have to hope he could do the best possible with primitive technology. And possibly do a background check on some of the islanders. Yes, he might just do that. Starting with a certain journalist called Ishmael.


link2 comments post comment

Because sometimes the world is even more than OK [May. 4th, 2007|02:46 am]
[Tags|, , , ]
[Current Location |Home]
[mood | pleased]

Hmm, I went to see comedy today. Belgian comedy. Well, my alter ego did. The secret identity thing is getting a bit schizophrenic but then again I was never quite normal. And even if I ever was normal, I made a bloody point of NOT being normal, and it's far too tedious to go back to it now anyway. More so, I'm not good at being normal. I'm good at being strange, and quaint and awkward. So if the improbable was true, and I am normal at the core, I better make a point of hiding it....

Anyway, I'm disgressing.

Usually I'm more familiar with the UK variety of comedy, which granted, is better. But that didn't stop me from having a good laugh. It's on nights like this, I think the world is actually OK, more than OK. And I believe - or hope - that humanity will get past such minor catastrofies like war, global warming, or a little pandamic here and there. I get the whole New Doctor Who thing...where I look at people, and I think they're bloody amazing, and somehow it all seems good.

I'm sure I'll snap out of it the second I meet the next idiot, but, it's nice..while it lasts.

More good news.....well for me anyway...I'm writing a new fic. It's called Comfort & Monsters and it features Captan Jack from Torchwood. Hooray! Yes, get your fangirly (or fanboyish) fix, cause Kallee's  back to writing slash. Oh and...*gasp*, it actually has a plot.
linkpost comment

The Thing About Kissing [Mar. 20th, 2007|06:18 pm]
[Tags|, , , , , , , , , , ]
[Current Location |Home]
[mood | content]
[music |snow Patrol - Chasing Cars]

My newest fanfic product:

Note:  //…//  is telepathic talk

 

The Thing About Kissing

 

Rogue stood on the roof of the X-Mansion, looking out over the landscape. To the West, the summer sun was already setting, emitting the last rays of its golden glow on the horizon. A light breeze played with her two-coloured hair, caressing her in ways that were usually denied to her. On this evening, she felt unusually content with the world. She took a few steps, and her feet left the edge of the roof. Instead of crashing like other mortals would, she flew up into the evening sky. She danced a dance without gravity, making pirouettes in the air. On moments like these, she actually liked her powers. So many children dreamt of being able to fly. Once upon a time, she did too. And now she could.

She decided to head for the trees, using them as an obstacle course. With great speed she flew through and around widespread branches, avoiding some of them by less than an inch. She lost track of time and only stopped her playful maneuvers when she realised it was getting difficult to see.

The grass below looked tempting still, though. She landed gracefully and sat down beneath one of the trees. She slipped off her gloves, digging her fingers into the sea of green. It felt good to touch something, to feel her fingertips tingle while knowing she wasn’t causing damage.

She closed her eyes, breathing in the scent of flowers in bloom. She remained there for a long while, enjoying her unexpected bout of happiness.

 

When she did open her eyes at last, something caught her attention. Beyond the trees there was a light glow. Too late for the sunset, it was already fully dark. Besides, it was more local. It looked like a campfire. Only thing was, if it was a fire she should have smelled it. Yet not even the slightest hint of smoke was carried on the wind. She lifted up from the ground, regaining the freedom of flight. As she flew closer, she could make out a silhouette. The light was man-made. Quite literally, in fact. Sitting at the base of a tree, the young mutant known as Chamber was surrounded by the psionic energy that was produced by his own body. No bandages restricted his power and it danced around him like a fire, making for an interesting spectacle.

 

// Enjoying the freak show? //, a voice sounded in Rogue’s head. She should have known her presence would not go unnoticed. He was a telepath, after all.

 

“They might have told you this before, sugah, but it’s impolite to read people’s minds”. She said.

 

// I wasn’t reading yer mind. It was blatantly obvious. //

 

Rogue sighed mentally and approached the boy, sitting down next to him. He clearly wasn’t too keen on her doing that, she did not need telepathy to figure that out. But for the one time she actually felt at peace; she would not let him spoil the moment. Reluctantly, Chamber took the headphones out of his ears. Rogue had not noticed them before and only now she could hear the faint tones of rock music for a few seconds, before Chamber switched off his mp3-player.

 

“Ah think it’s rather beautiful, in fact.” she finally said.

 

// You don’t have to try to make me feel better. // he stated.

 

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

 

Much to Rogue’s disappointment, the young Brit was already wrapping bandages around what was left of his face and torso, plunging their surroundings into darkness again. Silence, too, was restored and neither of them spoke for the longest time. The strange thing was, they both seemed rather comfortable to sit like this – quiet, motionless, not doing anything in particular.

 

“Don’t you evah like being a mutant? Ah don’t mean always, but sometimes?” Rogue finally dared to ask.

 

// Do you? // He bounced the question back at her.

 

“Sometimes. Today ah do.”

 

Again her words sank into silence. She studied Chamber’s eyes in the darkness. He looked pensive, sad even. He pulled up his legs, wrapping his arms around them as if trying to protect himself.

 

// Doesn’t it drive you bonkers, luv? //

 

“What exactly, Jonothon ?”

 

// Not being able to kiss. Cause I can’t bloody bear it. Now I thought it would get better with time, I really did. But it just doesn’t. Every day without it I’m just reminded of what I’ve lost. //

 Jono’s voice felt like it was breaking up – that is, if telepathic voices could break up. If not, Rogue thought, she was just reading too much into it. But his body language seemed to support her theory.

 

“At least you can touch. God, Jono, there’s so many things you can do. Things ah can only dream about.”

 

// I know. That’s why I wonder how you can bear it. //

 

“Ah take one day at a time.”

 

// And what about love? //  Again, a tremble in his “voice”.

 

“Ah think love is more than just kissing.” She said. “But maybe ah’m not the right person to ask.”

 

Rogue’s words died out in the night air. It took a good few minutes until he spoke again.

 

// It’s funny. You sound a bit like her. Yer accent’s similar, I mean. //

 

“Like Husk?”

 

Chamber nodded in the darkness. Rogue put on one of her gloves again, and reached for his hand. Much to her surprise he not only let her, but squeezed back against her fingers. Perhaps it was possible to give him some comfort, after all.

 

// You could probably touch me without killing me. I’m just a shell. I don’t even have a pulse. //

 

“Let’s not find out the hard way, sugah.”

 

Jonothon Starsmore looked at the sky, and if he was trying to find an answer there. The constellation of Ursa Major was reflected in his eyes.

 

~Sometimes I just wish I wasn’t born at all. Or born normal. Or at least, if I had to be a mutant, to just be born without all these feelings. ~

 

“But then what’s the point of fightin’? If there’s nothin’ to fight for?”

 

// I don’t know. But it just might make things bearable. //

 

Silence. And then a sob. It was a sob, not just her imagination, she was quite sure. It rang in her head.

 

“Jono?”

 

No answer came from the black-clad figure, but she could swear she felt him shiver. It was easy to forget he was just a boy really, not even out of his teens yet. The world they lived in, the hatred, their powers – they all made them grow up too soon. She pulled him closer and wrapped her arms around him. She felt the tensing in his muscles, the uneasiness he felt from such proximity. Yet again he did not stop her. He leaned in, allowing her to hold him. He buried what was left of his face against her shoulder.

 

“It’s her loss, you know”. Rogue said as she stroked his hair.

 

// Nah. That’s just what people say to make themselves feel better. A gal like her could never love a bloke like me. She deserves much more. It just took her a long time to figger it out. //

 

Chamber pulled away from her. She could just make out his eyes in the moonlight. They were the saddest eyes she’d ever seen, and that was something. No tears, though – and her breath stopped when she realised he might not be able to cry.

 

“Sugah…” she started, hoping she sounder confident. “Thing is, we all gotta find ourselves a place in this world. An’ feeling sorry for yourself ain’t gonna make it any easier.”

 

She put her hand where his cheek once was. “Everyone deserves to be loved. But it ain’t even about who we deserve; it’s about who we love. And the thing about kissin’ – well, it ain’t about your lips, or about technique or whateva silly magazines will tell ya. It’s about showing people how much you care.”

 

With that, she pressed her own lips on the spot where his lips used to be. His bandages formed a barrier – a safety net that allowed both to share something of a kiss without causing damage to each other.

 

They broke contact after a long time, only to reinitiate it moments later. Rogue’s hands trailed down his back, feeling his contours under the leather jackets. He, in turn, wrapped his arms around her waist. Again they kissed, in their own special way. 

 

Finally they broke away, looking into each other’s eyes.

 

// Rogue, we can’t…//  he finally started.

 

She placed her finger on non-existing lips.

 

“Hush, darlin’. I know. But we’ll always have this.”

 

She hugged him once more, sharing genuine affection.

 

“Love’s worth fightin’ for, Jono. You’re worth fightin’ for. Don’t you evah forget that.”

 

She broke the hug, smiling at him. She flew up again, leaving before the moment could end, invaded by reality. As she headed back to the mansion, she could see light coming from behind the trees again. Chamber’s psionic energy had been set free again and danced in the darkness. Rogue smiled again, even though this time there was no-one to see it.

 

Today, she was contented with the world indeed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

linkpost comment

Mutant Growing Pains, Part I [Feb. 27th, 2007|08:25 pm]
[Tags|, , , , ]
[Current Location |Home]
[mood | tired]
[music |none]

I freaked out a nurse today. It wasn't intentional, I swear. Thing is, I have a damaged shoulder and I'm going to physiotherapy. Other thing is, I'm a mutant. I identify as one anyway. Not that I have any bling bling powers, unfortunately. People would call me double-jointed, or a contortionist. I just bend in ways other people don't. It hurt like hell, actually, when growing up. I don't know if it ever stopped hurting or if i grew immune to the pain. People just thought I was making it up to get attention. Like they don't believe I dislocate stuff.

Anyway, it's not like I didn't warn her. I actually said my joints fly out of their sockets. I think she thought I was exaggerating. Only then I did an exercice where arms should go up to a 90 degree angle and mine went about full circle. She actually shrieked and left the room. Not in a bad way, of course. She's a nice girl. It was actually quite amusing to see. Now, the doctor present was actually more interested. They tend to be. Once another doctor called in an intern to show her the fine specimen that I am. This one wondered if I could flip my fingers back to my wrist. So I indulged him by showing him. I got the circus remark again. Funnily, I did actually considered going to circus school once. Maybe I should have, might have been a hell of a lot of fun.

I any case, it was odd. Firstly, because I actually forgot other people don't move that way. Secondly, because my days of shocking people with it have long past. As a teen, I quite enjoyed getting the old freaked out look on people's faces. But it gets old, really.
I like movig that way, though. Rather not being able to move that way would be really restrictive. Like being trapped in your own skeleton. That's what I fear most really. That they'll have to do surgery, or that my joints will deform badly with time.

But I suppose only time will tell.
linkpost comment

Braver [Feb. 22nd, 2007|03:50 am]
[Tags|, , , , , , , , , , ]
[mood | tired]

A lil thingy the voices in my head told me to write tonight

This is an OLD fandom, folks, but I loved these two ever since Generation X first came out.

Title:Braver
Author: Kallanda Lee
Word Count: 1.135
Fandom: Generation X/X-Men
Rating: PG, nothing awful or explicit
Pairing: Paige(Husk)/Jono(Chamber)
Summary : Paige visits Jono after he's been depowered
No beta; you have been warned!

Braver

Footsteps sounded in the artificially lit hallway. The young woman moved as if she were afraid of her own shadow; her own clicking heels felt like the equivalent of explosions in her ears. The distance she needed the bridge to reach the door could as well be the other end of the world. She was not supposed to be here, yet she could not bring herself to stay away. Arriving at the door, she still hesitated. Tentative fingers reached for the handle but did not push down. She pressed her ear against the door and was greeted by the sound of machines – machines designed to keep someone alive. Other that that, she didn’t hear a sound. Not even breathing. Not that she expected there to be.
Mustering her courage, she pushed the door open. She kept her eyes down, afraid to look at the young man in the hospital bed.
She felt ashamed coming here in disguise. After all this time, she wished she was braver. A strange sound broke the monotony of machine noise – a sound similar to tearing paper, only louder and somehow more disconcerting. A metamorphosis took place in the hospital room. The young woman, quite literally, burst out of her skin. Her face, her hair, her pigmentation – it all changed in a heartbeat. Emerging from under the throwaway skin came the girl’s true appearance, that of Paige Guthrie, mutant girl-next-door. She dropped her old husk into a trash can unceremoniously, and sat down next to the bed. She could finally bring herself to look at the man – really look at him.

Jonothon Evan Starsmore. Her first love.

He was sleeping, his body broken. Seeing him like this made Paige understand why he had pushed her away in the past. It was a gruesome sight, to be fair. The entire lower jaw was torn off; there was a hole where his lungs and his heart should be. By all intents and purposes he should be dead, but he was fighting still. What truly sent shivers down Paige’s spine were the dozens of little tubes that were connected to him, keeping him alive. She was a shapeshifter, not an empath, but she could almost feel his pain. It was pressing down on her like a physical entity. Tears formed in her sky-blue eyes.

“Oh Jono, how did we get into this mess?” she sobbed quietly. Her question remained unanswered, as she knew it would.

She reached for his hand, entwining her fingers with his. How she missed his voice in her head. How she missed the innocence of their youth. Two losses so different, yet somehow connected. She wished she could kiss him – on the lips, tongues meeting, devouring each other. She wished she could have done it just once, long ago before they were mutants. One kiss. Would it have made a difference? Could one kiss have made up for all future kisses he couldn’t give her?

Her breathing became erratic, interrupted by sobs that seemed to sync with the pumping machines. Still Jonothon lay motionless, unaware of her presence. She moved her other hand to his forehead, caressing it. She wondered how she had ever led herself to believe that she had stopped loving him. How utterly she had lied to herself. Her body – her amazing body that could turn into anything she chose - was craving to do the one thing it could not: to become one with the man before her. She brought his hand to her lips, placing soft kisses on it. Precious contact, but painfully insufficient.
“I love you.” she whispered against his fingers, her confession remaining unheard.

Her own words scared her. At least he could not push her away, she thought. At least he wouldn’t hurt her feelings by trying to talk her out of wanting him.
She tried to imagine them on that beautiful autumn day; the day after their explosive kiss. She wondered how things might have turned out if she hadn’t told him she was embarrassed. She should have been stronger, but pride got in the way. How lovely it might have been though, curling up in his arms, surrounded by falling leaves. She held the image in her mind, repeating it, holding it, until it almost became a memory. She almost wished he could read her mind now, share in her reverie.

Then he stirred. It was just a faint movement, but it startled her nonetheless. His fingers tightened around hers. His face – what was left of it – distorted in pain. And as much as she wanted not to, she panicked. Her breathing stopped when his eyelashes fluttered. When his eyes flung open, she knew he recognized her instantly. There was shock in his eyes, and pain. Although he couldn’t speak, she knew what his eyes were telling her. He did not want her to see him like this. So here they were, trapped in their old dance again. He did not even need words to push her away.

And she…she still wished she were braver when she brought her lips to kiss his hand once more. She wanted stay with him, to cover what was left of his face with kisses. But her grip on his hand was already loosening.

Once more the sound of tearing skin could be heard in the room. Before Jono’s eyes, she turned into a stranger. And while every cell in her body begged her to stay, she turned away nonetheless.

Would he have called out to her, she wondered, if he had a mouth? Would he have gotten into her mind if he still had his powers?

But what ifs and maybes couldn’t help her now.

The steps to the door seemed a longer distance still that when she arrived. It was strange really, she should be happy. She had an angel waiting at home. Their relationship was simple. He was nothing like the man in the hospital bed. He was beautiful and charming, and wouldn’t push her away. He would take her in his arms and tell her he loved her. He would supply her with all the kisses she could ever wish for. Yet all his kisses couldn’t make up for that one kiss, the kiss she’d never gotten from the man she truly loved.

Tonight she’d go back to her lover, curl up in his embrace, and tell him nothing of the day’s events. She’d laugh, and flirt, and pretend everything is just fine. But in her mind, she’d go back to that autumn day with Jonothon Starmore. She’d rewrite it entirely. She wouldn’t laugh, she wouldn’t flirt, and she would just be. He would hold her and the world would go away. His mind would touch hers and she’d never have to pretend again.

Ah, if only she were braver…
linkpost comment

Another test thingy [Jan. 14th, 2007|01:51 am]
According to the SelectSmart.com Belief System Selector, my #1 belief match is Secular Humanism. </br> What do you believe?</b></a> Visit SelectSmart.com/RELIGION


The full explanation would be:
# Secular Humanism Belief in Deity: Not considered important. Most Humanists are atheists or agnostics.
# Incarnations: Same as above.
# Origins of universe/life: The scientific method is most respected as the means for revealing the mysteries of the origins of the universe and life.
# After death: An afterlife or spiritual existence after death is not recognized.
# Why evil? No concept of “evil.” Reasons for wrongdoing are explored through scientific methods, e.g. through study of sociology, psychology, criminology, etc.
# Salvation: No concept of afterlife or spiritual liberation or salvation. Realizing ones personal potential and working for the betterment of humanity through ethical consciousness and social works are considered paramount, but from a naturalistic rather than supernatural standpoint.
# Undeserved suffering: No spiritual reasons, but rather a matter of human vulnerability to misfortune, illness, and victimization.
# Contemporary Issues: The American Humanist Association endorses elective abortion. Other contemporary views include working for equality for homosexuals, gender equality, a secular approach to divorce and remarriage, working to end poverty, promoting peace and non-violence, and environmental protection.

Pretty much me...though lack of an afterlife does sounds depressing that way - ah well.
Is still I'll be reborn as something cool - but stopped believing that long ago really.
linkpost comment

(no subject) [Oct. 31st, 2006|07:33 am]
[mood | bored]

I am...procrastinator supreme! On that note (not entirely related), I still want to write something about ordinary people becoming heroes in some vaguely comic ways. Oh hell, it's going to be one of *those* days again...

Notes to self:
Sleep more
Keep off the sweets, damnit
linkpost comment

Also... [Oct. 29th, 2006|06:00 pm]
Did I mention I *hate* the hour changing? It's dark earlier now! Clearly, they should change it the *other* way around...
linkpost comment

The Oven [Oct. 29th, 2006|04:57 pm]
[Tags|]

My mother tried to explain to me how to use the oven today. You know, and old fashioned-one where you need to play with fire to get it working. I tried. I tried again. And again. And failed.

I was deafeated by the oven.

Ah well, so it's Aiki noodles for the rest of my life then...
linkpost comment

*Sigh* [Oct. 19th, 2006|01:18 am]
[Current Location |Home Sweet Home]
[mood | tired]
[music |sound of silence]

Seems like my love/hate relationship with school will never end - that being said, i've been masochistic enough to go through higher learning. I often feel like a fraud, really. Like I should not have gotten where I am.

Being partly self-taught does have it's drawbacks. You're used to freedom, which I'm not getting now. Also you get large "holes" in your knowledge because you only focused on stuff you like. You learn how to pass the exams in creative ways (like emotional blackmail, but that's another story..)

People are odd, too. My new classmates are nice, really. I can't say anything bad about them to be fair - except that they are terribly normal, which I've grown unaccustomed to.

I spent 4 years doing film and writing in college, and the mentality is just very different.
And before, being in "weirdo' school as I affectinately call it - it was a world of difference.

I've forgotten, it seems, how large the differences were. Of course it's terribly politically incorrect to say it. So I do just shut up most of the time.

Ah well, the wonders of social interaction...
linkpost comment

(no subject) [Oct. 1st, 2006|12:02 am]
Test results of this little test:


You scored as Anarchism. <'Imunimaginative's Deviantart Page'>

</td>

Anarchism

83%

Democrat

67%

Socialist

42%

Green

33%

Communism

33%

Fascism

25%

Nazi

8%

Republican

8%

What Political Party Do Your Beliefs Put You In?
created with QuizFarm.com
linkpost comment

Where Ghosts Live [Sep. 30th, 2006|03:30 am]
That's the name of chapter 22. I just finished writing it. It will need some polishing up but will be posted this weekend. I'm rather pleased with how it turned out.
linkpost comment

(no subject) [Sep. 28th, 2006|10:06 pm]
[Current Location |home]
[mood | content]
[music |sound of the TV that my dad is watching]

Someone complimented me yesterday, so I suppose that deserves to be said. She said she thought I was younger than I am!  It's odd, I looked much older than I was most of my life,so it's nice to have it turn around now :)
linkpost comment

My Ramblings #1 [Sep. 26th, 2006|12:29 am]
[Current Location |Inside, looking out]
[mood | lonely]
[music |The quiet sound of night]

So the first day of shool had passed and gone and as usual I once again have mixed feelings about it. Too late to change now, I guess - there will always be a love/hate relationship between me and the education system. Different school, different problems - yet the same ones too, the eternal story of my life. Cfr. my eventful highschool career, which I may or may not describe at some point.

Sometimes I think it's a strange sort of masochism on my part, or maybe a thirst for knowledge that is stronger than my reluctance. It could be revenge, too, to show all tose people who had no faith in me wrong. Sometimes that is the greatest satisfaction of all. And sometimes...sometimes I just desperately cling to my childhood, trying to prolonge it for just a few more months. Ah, what strange people humans are.

I used to love September. It always felt more like the New Year than January. Something fresh, something new. I loved how I went to the shop to pick out new stationary,new notebooks to write in - a new start, a clean slate, quite literally. Now everything is so bittersweet. Tainted.

I go with the flow, meandering with the current, never knowing which shore i'll end up on. And that was fine once, exciting. But there is a limit to that too.

But what I dislike most of all is pretending normality...I had almost forgotten how much. It's the loneliest feeling in the world. And I feel like a traitor, too.

The worst part is I'm not even unhappy. I know I sound like I am, but I'm not. I have achieved all I wished to, despite the odds. I have those who love me, despite myself. But somehow, it's not enough.

And then there's this eternal, infernal need to prove myself again. To rise above myself. And here I go again, starting a brand new year of trouble...
linkpost comment

Testing [Sep. 14th, 2006|11:53 pm]
Test for lj-cut 

Blah Blah )






linkpost comment

Love & Other Sharp Things [Sep. 12th, 2006|11:22 pm]
[Tags|, , , , , ]
[mood | tired]
[music |Tv in the background]

Hello!
I have posted a few new chapters to "Love & Other Sharp Things"
They can be found here http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3012887/1/
(If I typed that correctly!)
Feedback is always welcome, of course...otherwise, enjoy!
linkpost comment

The Fic [Jul. 4th, 2006|03:40 am]
[Current Location |home]
[mood | tired]
[music |some Arabic thingy I don't know the name of]

Yay, Chapter 9 - An Exercise in Proximity is up!
linkpost comment

Love & Other Sharp Things [Jul. 2nd, 2006|10:31 pm]
I finally got around to posting my fanfic.

It can be found here
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3012887/1/
and here
http://www.piratestripes.net/vendetta/v/viewstory.php?sid=133&ageconsent=ok
It's called "Love & Other Sharp Things - an yes, V's back from the dead again in this one. I'll be building up a personal site shortly, so I'll post that here too, soon.

Please note the story contains some violence.

I hope you enjoy!
linkpost comment

navigation
[ viewing | most recent entries ]

Advertisement